Everybody gets high on weekends. Everybody does, everyone is, but me…

August 23, 2008


I usually watch movies alone but this time, I invited Tita Jasmine and Nerissa to watch Wall-E with me.

When I hear the maker “PIXAR”, the first thing that comes to my mind is something enjoyable. But this movie is different. Well of course, in every rule, there’s always an exception.

The movie was somewhat disturbing. I know I was supposed to enjoy it but I did not. It was a slap to my face. I guess too much technology eats your flesh.

Among other things, these I find most alarming:

  • What if you have to leave your galaxy to live in another because life is becoming extinct here?
  • What if you get obese because you don’t get to do anything – you ask for it, you have it?
  • What if you live your life without complications? Everything is programmed. Everyday is a routine.
  • What if you go on with your life without any challenge at all to test your vulnerability?
  • Imagine being an outcast, condemned by many because YOU JUST DON’T BELONG?
  • What if you ONLY get to see plants and trees on pictures because there are no longer any.
  • What if you don’t get to experience the bliss of dancing because you don’t get the chance to listen to music.
  • Imagine earth as a dumping ground.
  • What if all it takes is a single strike to make you face reality which could eventually save you?

Too bad, I can’t imagine all these because I choose not too. It’s way beyond my comprehension.

As what the captain said, “But I don’t want to survive, I want to live!”

August 23, 2008


I’m so into tv series nowadays where hospitals are the main setting (e.g. House, Grey’s Anatomy, Scrubs…). It drives me nuts. Maybe it’s the subconscious mind that’s driving me into it (to fit in?). Yes,I’m the only non-med in our family.

Hospitals are creepy. You smell death every time, everywhere. Not to mention, It also ignites curiosity.

I have this fantasy of loitering around ER during unholy hours. And there I was! I just wanted to satisfy my curiosity on how it feels like when adrenaline rushes in – a threshold test on how far I can go.

I stood beside Tita Jasmine while she was having her consult. I was busy observing the staff on how good they carry out SOP. Moments later, a couple came in. The woman was obviously pale. She came right to the table where we’re at and she just said, “ABORTION”. How horrified I was! Terrified! Petrified! She must have meant miscarriage – but no! I heard it loud and clear. She said “abortion”. It came to my senses on what was really going on. The clock was ticking faster than it should be. Four pediabeds were occupied, all the kids had seizures! Sa pedia rana ha. Naa pay Critical Care, Adult Care, Surgery. The cries were deafening. The scene was blinding. People started coming in and out – oxygen here, needles there… The word “abortion” triggered it all.

Well, so much of my fantasy.

August 23, 2008


I was thinking of buying some pirated DVDs along Fuente (yeah, I know). I figured that a little walk wouldn’t hurt. I love nightlights. You see lovers here and there, families sleeping all over the place, and did I not mention that traffic at that very hour was out-of-the-question? Damn! Mango is definitely a place of evil!

My soul was squeezed when we passed by a group of kids sniffing the obvious. There were at least 10 of them, I’d say 9 the eldest. I am aware that addiction is rampant but I haven’t seen anything worse than that. GOD! Those homeless kids are dying!

Sad thing was, no one bothered to reprimand their actions. The police station is just a hundred meters away. The officer was too busy issuing traffic tickets. I suppose “Business As Usual”? Or the neon lights were too bright, they blind? i know I could have done something to help them but I didn’t. I am ashamed of myself for not doing so. Here I am – whining about people not learning, people not helping. I know I should and could have… but I just didn’t.

I want to be in this battle. But how can I start? I can’t even go to sleep just thinking about it. Get away Alprazolam!!!